Alone and Tired of Breathing

6:17pm: Shit...double shit
It's really getting to me how much Em is doing to herself - I know she's still cutting, and she OD'd last weekend too. It's scary, because I feel like I don't know whether she'll still be alive next week. But its not helping because we're both in a similar position, so I can't help, and she can't help me, or at least that's how it feels, cos if I say I'm struggling, I feel that'll make her feel bad, and vice versa. It sucks.

Andi

6:47pm: Good day
I can't decide whether being on holiday is a good thing or not. I like being able to get up late, but miss seeing friends. Today was fun though - met up with Helen and shopped, had coffee, etc. I'm off skiing on Friday too - rahhh!!! Can't wait - its gonna be great to be away with friends and without parents/adults to keep an eye on us (not that we're gonna get up to anything, but it just seems exciting and independent)

Anyway, I should be packing, and finishing off maths work. Only...I can't be bothered. Think I'll just browse bus for a bit longer. Then go have a shower.

Andi

10:45pm: Well hellooooooooooooo....
ok, figure I should really write something in here. I could never be bothered to set one of these up before cos I figured no one would look at it, but never mind, I have some time on my hands. Actually thats a total lie - I have tons of college work to get done, but anyway, that's not the point...

Bands I like right now include: H.I.M., Linkin Park, Greenday, Steriogram, Marilyn Manson, Snow Patrol, bandwithnoname, Evanescence, Nirvana, Papa Roach, Placebo, the Offspring, etc etc etc.

Life right now...is crap - I'm v low, stressed about college stuff, the future, driving. I'm doing some dumb stuff which is completely unproductive. I should really grow up and realise that a lot of people have it worse than me, but right now I'm finding it hard to do that.

I should go to bed now really, the later I stay up the more likely I am to do something I regret.